MILF WARRIOR / Code Pimps / PC



I've never actually watched the show Desperate Housewives, but I guess MILF Warrior is like the porn parody version, except in game form? I dunno.

Anyway, whatever the case, you're a strapping landscaper who toodles about an upper-class suburb on his lawnmower. But instead of working, you're checking mailboxes to see if randy MILFs have left you notes. They'll ask you to do some mundane task, then reward you with The Sexing when you walk up to the house. Unfortunately, in Leisure Suit Larry style you're often interrupted en flagarante, except here it's by an angry husband with a gun. Probably shouldn't have done it in broad daylight in the front yard while he was home, but the MILF Warrior must do what his clients ask I suppose.



So I guess the goal is just to track down six women and MILF it up without getting killed. Aside from angry hubbies shooting you to death, you also have to worry about not blowing up your lawnmower. Which is tricky because it doesn't have visible indicators of damage, and you'll also sometimes just randomly flip over for no apparent reason.

The actual sexy time is pretty disappointing as it appears that all the MILFs use the same character model, just with different colored bras and panties. The acts also look more like a pantomime, and that's if you're positioned properly ... my first encounter actually had the MILF giving a blowjob to my tractor's engine while her husband shot me in the back of the head. Every encounter is also the same routine of picking between four prefab sex acts with the same simple repetitive animations until the husband comes out and starts blasting away.



The tasks are very simple, basically either pick up a bunch of items, or find something scurrying around and run it over. I couldn't really progress far in the game as I couldn't even find the cat you're supposed to shave or the chicken you're supposed to kill, however. I expect the game doesn't go any farther than the starting neighborhood given the low-budgetness of it all.

Play control is actually OK when you're on the mower, random flip-overs aside. When you get off the camera goes all to shit and starts swinging wildly, however.

There's no purpose to playing the game other than "look how stupid this is" factor, as the gameplay isn't enjoyable and the titillation is primitive and about as un-erotic as it gets. Definitely don't spend any money on it.


                                   Another suburban tragedy

Links :

* Playable demo






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