WONDER MOMO / Namco / Turbografx 16

I guess "cute" was the theme that Namco was going for with this one, but "creepy" is what they ended up coming out with.

Yeah, so Momo is this girl that stole Samus Aran's helmet apparently ... boy is she gonna be pissed when she finds out who did it!

She might be the final boss ... all cruising in in her crazy helmet-shaped ship ... I wouldn't know, though, because this game is fiendishly difficult.

Yeah and it's mostly due to sloppy gameplay. Momo plays the game out on stage, with some crowd of cloned men wildly cheering her on ... probably because they are looking directly up her ridiculously short skirt. Enemies come from the left and right of the stage, and Lumpy Pedophile Ninjas will morph right out of the ground at Momo's feet to try to commit unspeakable acts on her.

Momo only has high kicks to defend herself with ... she can also jump-kick, and do a splits kick if you face towards the crowd and then jump ... but eventually on every level some tornado comes out and if you touch it you transform into Wonder Momo, who gets some inaccurate hula hoop boomerang to throw at enemies.

There's also some power-up that freezes you in place for a few seconds and makes you spew death beams to the left and right while your sprite glitches up ... I thought it was a bug in the game the first time it happened.

You basically just have to kill a certain amount of enemies to continue ... on some levels a boss shuffles out and you just have to take them out to proceed.

Also watch out for pervo cameraman who sometimes runs through the crowd ... if he successfully gets an upskirt pick of you you get frozen for a couple seconds while you contemplate how many websites it's going to appear on the next day.

I don't know why the girl is so concerned about the cameraman, when every jump and split kick that she does gratuitously flashes her panties at the crowd anyway.

I think games can often reveal a lot about the personality of their designer ... what this one says to me is, "I am a man who not only enjoys looking up the skirts of little girls, but fancies the idea of lumpy masked men molesting them in unspeakable ways".

Only other point of note is that this game has some of the most atrocious, ear-grating sound and music ever created.

Definitely one to stay far away from. Though you pervs will probably all go and download it now anyway.

Videos :

Gameplay Video
Wonder Momo Live In Concert?
Wonder Momo v.s. Popeye - the legendary duel
Wonder Momo and Berabow Man in Namco X Capcom